My mental health became a difficulty to me in 2nd year at school when I started to self-harm to cope. I felt selfish because even though my life had its ups and downs, I didn’t have a particularly bad upbringing. Gradually my mum began to learn the extent of my mental health difficulties, however I only ever really told close friends.
One friend once told a teacher about me because she was worried but the teacher never ever done anything about it, this was around 3rd year. In 4th year, was when a teacher referred me to guidance for erratic behaviour and disengagement in class. A meeting with my mum and guidance teacher is when everything started to look up for me. The fact that at least one teacher at school knew of my struggles made classes so much easier as plans were put in place for me. I could leave a class at any given time if I felt stressed and I received anger management by my teacher.
In the mean time, I was referred to CAMHs twice. Even though I was over 18, CAMHs took me on as they thought they were best suited to help me. When I went for my initial assessment, that’s when I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. The choice of therapy that was picked for me was CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and I worked on that once a week for over a year with my therapist. CBT didn’t suit me and the practice of it didn’t help me but it did have its benefits. It outlined why I think a certain way and it helped my frustrations with others as I understood where they came from when acting a certain way. As of recent, there are queries that I actually might be bipolar, which makes me feel so much better. Knowing it’s not all in my head and that its really happening. I’m not making this up and believe me people will listen.
Now I’m at University where I thought everything would be so much better as it would be a fresh start, but it wasn’t. I still have my struggles but now people are aware of them, I have access to the help I need. I have access to a GP to receive the meds I need and the campus has a councillor and mental health nurse on hand. I even have someone who will help me with my studies to keep me on track. Even though my mental illness isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, I now have an understanding of how my body works and why things happen. Seeking help was one of the best things I ever done.
Seek help - once someone knows how your feeling, they can adapt your surroundings and help in any way possible, making life easier for you.