Darkness (1/?) By Ellie Prouse

We were driving into this small town called Connecticut. It looks peaceful but it can't be as bad as California. I'm sitting in the middle seat of the car. My mum and dad are in are in front and my sister Ivy and Theo, my brother Theo on each side of me. I look outside Theo's window and see people making out. My eyes well up as I am reminded I can't have friends or even a boyfriend. I had a few friends at my old school but my siblings ruined that.

Once we reach our new house, I clamber out the car as soon as possible, so I can pick my room and unpack. I then start to cry.

"Stop Crying", snarled Ivy. I sigh, then wipe my tears away. My mum gives me a concerned look, but she knows she can't do anything because dad will either beat me or her. I finally pick my room. I loved it. It had a window seat that overlook the back garden, private bathroom, king size bed. the list of perks went on and on. 

I go and sit at my window seat and see kids, who look so happy and among their smiling friends. I then start crying quietly, insuring that my family do not hear me.  Glancing out the window again, seeing a boy typing on his laptop. From this distance he looks like any average boy, wearing a beanie and a leather jacket.

He looks up from his laptop and directly looks at me. He smiles at me, i give him the middle finger. It felt like we were friends already. I quickly go to my bathroom and hop in the shower. I hear a knock on my door just as I unlock the bathroom door. I immediately knowing its my mum and open my bedroom door.

"Hey Sweetie" she sighs with a worry look on her face, hugging a cup of tea. I show a little smile, hoping she won't question my mental state. 

"What's wrong baby", she asks. I then start to cry and look at the bathroom door, ready to run and lock myself in.

"Lili" she says tentatively. Her tone has me fighting not to look at her.

"I want to have friends, I want people who I can talk to that isn't you, no offence", I say, feeling a slight weight off my chest.

"Then when you go to school tomorrow make some" she says while smiling at me.

"You know I can't" 

"They won't do anything, Lils" Mum places her cup of tea on my nightstand, before taking her place next to me on the bed. 

"They will, plus I am better being the weirdo girl who is always alone" my voice hitches ever so slightly. She kissed my forehead.

"You're an amazing daughter and person but once in a while you have to think of yourself".

I look at the window and immediately make contact with the boys eyes. He is looking at me with a glare. it rivals my own.

"That boy... seems great" Mum's voices makes me jump. She too had been looking at the boy. 

"What" I ask confused.

"Oh nothing, he just reminds me of someone when I was your age" Her eyes go distant for a moment. 

"Okay" She kisses my forehead again.

"You are allowed to cry Lili, in front of everyone, you can show your emotions", she says worried. I shake my heard

"I don't want to get hurt anymore", I say.

She sighs and gets up knowing I want to be alone and kissed my forehead, "Night baby, I love you", she says.

I smile a little

"Love you too", I say and with that she closes my door. I can feel my eyes watering and run to my door to lock it. I run back to my window seat and I start to sob into my knees, arms around my legs.

Thirty minutes later, I look out my window and see the boy staring at me. Has he been looking me at me this whole entire time? I get up, and go under my covers on the bed, still with my clothes on. I grab my pen and diary which was in my bag that was beside my bed. I start to write.

Dear Diary, Today we came to Connecticut. It's looks nice. Our house is cool, I love it. My room is amazing. I have a bed and a window seat! Ivy and Theo hit me again today. I'm scared to tell mum... They are ignoring me, which is great. I live next to a hot guy. He wears a beanie and always seems to be on his laptop. His eyes were piercing green and hair is black but I know that I can't talk to him ever... So I'm not going to do it, not a million years. He seems to care for me. Hopefully that will change, by me not talking to him. Tomorrow is my first day at my new school. I don't know if I will survive school.

I hide my diary and pen back in my bag and zip it up and go to sleep crying.

By Ellie Prouse